When we seek partnership with another, we must first note that we are seeking. Seeking points to the desire to have something that we think we do not have. Seeking happens when we wish to move away from where we are at…when we feel there is something we cannot give to ourselves, and we believe that perhaps another may have it to give. Seeking outside of ourselves for partnership precludes the belief that something we want does not lay within our grasp. Want to really find out what those things are? Get into a relationship and start taking notes…pay attention to what you feel you cannot receive or get from your partner. Here is where most of us get confused. This list becomes a list of complaints, of grievances, of fighting words laced with hurt and betrayal.
For transformation to occur, consider this list a WISH LIST….and give all those things to yourself. Let go of receiving them from your partner (friends, etc.).
Truly no one else can really give you what you seek. But they might really love to share what you have found. And the more you receive from yourself, and unlock the sweet mystery of inner loving, the more you will have to share, and wish to share. Giving these things to yourself, also allows you to release from patterned relationships wherein you remain locked in, believing you must stay close in order to receive. The truth is that the more you give these things to yourself…the more likely it is, that you will attract a partner who freely offers them.
In the world we live in, we mostly draw in partners who are destined to not give us what we “need”…precisely so that we can witness what it is that we are sorely missing.
Seeking is the cause of all of our suffering.
Suffering ends through all of our seeking.
All suffering that appears through partnerships, can lead to freedom within partnerships. Giving to yourself doesn’t mean the relationship will end…but it will change the balance. All suffering will surface….at the least to be witnessed, and at the most, to be transformed.
Partnership, at a very basic and human level is about all those untended places within us, that still yearn for that unconditional love and appreciation that achingly feels missing within us. Personally it takes us on a karmic journey like no other. Spiritually, it is ultimately about divine union with our very own pain and hearts, that are just waiting to finally be reunited.
Who is our perfect partner? The one that leads us on all our seeking. Us. Whether we are single or in partnership…our seeking heart will always be our perfect partner.